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Unexpected

13 March , 2021

So, this school year is off to a crazy start…some of it good, some not so much. N has had to cope with a couple of doozies already, and it’s like this sign was an omen or something because she really is flying!

Let me set the scene (well, to a certain extent as I have only managed to wiggle very scant details out of the N vault). There was a heated incident in her circle of friends. She wasn’t even directly involved, but came out swinging in defence of the one she saw crying about it. She either really doesn’t know what the original fight was about or she doesn’t want to say.

It went very pear shaped. A few days after this it seemed like the original owners of the issue had put it behind them and 2 of the 3 girls had put N’s participation behind them too, although they did say they can’t talk to her at school until the other one does too. I suggested that it might be a good idea to apologise to number 3 for the intense reaction so that they could move on past this.

A few days later they all got together to tell N she’s not welcome there anymore. Even the one she stood up for. Girls this age are not freaking funny guys, harsh, harsh, harsh…anyhoo, we’re trying to give her the space to work through this in her own way, but I did say that she probably didn’t need “friends” like that anyway. Sjoe, not even my friends but the one I really expected better from, and the betrayal stings even though it’s not mine. *Reminds self not to get involved unless asked*

So I was kind of expecting some grumpiness and melancholy in the home front, understandably, but it has been the exact opposite of that!

It’s like the weight of the world has lifted off her shoulders. She’s chatty and animated, she’s laughing and helping out around the house, she’s already made a bunch of new budds and started a study club with some of them. She clocked an amazing 90% on her English oral and managed to connect with her Maths teacher. She hasn’t even moaned once about losing her screen time for a month (day of the fight she lashed out “a bit” at home).

Honestly, I’m in awe of how she’s doing with this. Am I missing something? Is it really going to be that easy? I have been watching her like a hawk to see if this is a I’m-doing-great show, but no, she genuinely seem to be on top of the world. What a relief! Also makes me speculate a bit in the true nature of this previous friendship to be honest.

This age was hard enough for me as a kid, but I had more control over it when it was my own life. Watching your kid learn to deal with this sort of thing is a kak spectator sport I tell you! Thank goodness she seems to be doing a fabulous job on it.

5 comments

  1. Ah man. Girls CAN be horrible hey! So glad that N is handling is well, that’s really good shame.


    • That’s a very polite way to put it…haha, I’m trying to be a good adult example so I can’t use the words I’m really thinking about. I think it’s about this age, maybe two years older, where I decided to keep my friend circle predominantly boys for less drama. I think the girls grow out of this cattiness slightly post high school thank goodness.


      • The “B” word is forefront, but let’s be polite 😉 Children are children I guess. Post high school is a looonnnggggg way!!


  2. I love that mural behind N. Okay before I get to the subject of the actual post, do her feet not get sore walking without shoes? I can’t even walk outside on the paving for long.

    I really feel your pain – I would also want to beat up the mean girls. I wonder if all that anxiety and worrying was under the surface and because there’s been a big blow-up, it’s actually relief that it’s all out in the open, one way or the other.

    xxx


    • Hehe, they wear shoes in winter so then the feet get tender going into spring, but by now they’re strong and no pain at all except on hot tar on very warm days.

      On the mean girls front, you could be right. I’m just glad she’s rolling with this so well.



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