R.I.P. Bijkersma Family
11 May , 2008
In between my studying today I took a well-deserved break and caught up with a bit of the posts and updates in my feed reader. Amongst others I also have all my facebook friends’ status updates running through there and I saw that one of my friends, Anneke Bijkersma, was thanking everyone for their support in this difficult time – so I decided to give her a call and find out what was going on.
What Anneke told me shocked me to silence – and I am not easily shocked to silence – there is absolutely not one single thing that I could say in response to the news she shared with me.
About a week ago, Anneke and her brother and sister went to the game reserve for a few days and on their return found both their parents, and the woman who cared for her mother (her mom was partially paralysed), brutally murdered in their house…her grandmother barely survived and is at the moment fighting for her life in ICU. Anneke says that her grandmother did manage to speak a little before she was taken to hospital and she said that one single man monster walked into their house and then slit first the care-giver and her mom’s throats and then her father’s before going for her grandmother too. He took nothing…and then left as quickly as he arrived. He was a stranger to them – who knows what could have moved someone to do something gruesome like this.
Anneke says that her other grandmother also passed away in the same week – and she is organising and attending four funerals this week.
These were people I knew! They were open friendly good natured people, regular down to earth middle class people, not living on a farm far away from anyone or a modern day mansion – they stayed a normal red brick house on the main road of Florida Johannesburg. I’ve had dinner in that house. I’ve spent evenings chit-chatting with that family (even though they were speaking in Dutch and I was speaking in Afrikaans, it worked just fine).
They are survived by their four children. The funerals are tomorrow. My thoughts and prayers are with them all.
The first thing I did after speaking to Anneke was phone my own family – I just wanted to hear their voices and make sure they were still okay.
- How do you get over something like that?
- What is this country coming to?
- Where will it all end?
I know no one really gets to decide when their time is up – but I hope that I get to go one day in a natural way of old age after a full and happy life and not in a senseless violent attack like this. But if that is what’s in store for me know this: I might go…but I will not go quietly.
I’m sick and tired of these sort of horrors.
- Is there even one person in SA whose life has not been touched by crime and violence?
- How can we turn this around?
- How can we take back this beautiful country from the rubbish that is choking it with this kind of terror?
It’s hard for me to study law when I see all the lawlessness around me. How do I get myself to believe in the words that I have to know and understand when it feels like such a farce in these times that we are living in? Inherently I’m an idealist, and I had hoped to fight the good fight and to make a difference in the lives of actual people one day with my degree – perhaps I’d make more of a difference if I could teach people how to defend themselves, or how to structure an effective lynch mob?
*sigh* 
Anyway, I’m not quite at that point yet – but one thing is for sure. Something’s got to going to give soon. Not just for me. I think everyone has had enough of this shit…and when it happens, it won’t be pretty.
I’m so glad you posted this. I hope everyone reads it and is horrified at what happened here! The saddest part is the meaninglessness of the attack. The attacker can’t even pretend to hide behind his own attempt at providing for his family or anything. It was just pure arrogance and senselessness! It makes me so mad.
I had heard a far briefer story of what happened to the family (and that itself was shocking enough!) because I’ve met one of the daughter’s thru her fiance who I work with.
It seems we are surrounded by crime and death. This past weekend, a friend of T’s lost his brother-in-law in an armed robbery in Pretoria. They shot him as he got up to investigate, he died instantly. They spent another 30 minutes in the house stealing valuables. Another 3 kids who will now grow up without a dad.
The same weekend my cousin and her family was attacked in their home in Port Elizabeth. Her husband was knocked unconscious with a piece of pipe, they tied her up, threatened to rape her and kill her kids, unless she showed them where the valuables were. The attack lasted three hours, but I think the pain and trauma will not be forgotten in their lifetimes.
Two incidents involving people close to me within two days. I am sure many people tell the same story. Crime used to be something that happened to friends of friends, now it happens to people close to you and you wonder when it will be your turn. If you want to know how people currently feel about their futures in SA, go look at the long queues outside Home Affairs, then look at the cars in the parking lot, and you will realise the economically active middle and upper classes are getting ready to leave…
phillygirl: I’ve met him too once or twice, and that daugter that you mention and I go waaaaay back. If you ever see her again ask her about the three wetsuit rule.
Small world hey?
It makes me really mad too…if robbery and revenge are not the motives, then what does that leave? And what does that spell out for this country and the rest of us?
Michelle K: You are right, this kind of stuff hits closer to home all the time. I don’t know what I’d do if something happened to my family – last year was pretty close when my brother was in armed robberies twice in one month! I have to trust that God will look after them (and me), because the police certainly won’t.
its simply heartbreaking louisa, and i thank the lord that neither i or my family have never had to go through anything that gruesome and frightening.
You and me both angel, and I hope and pray we never do…
I,m the brother Elsje Wouda who was also killed with the Bijkersmas family . Words cant describe how I feel and no one close to me understand how I feel because all my close family is in JHB and I live in Cape Town . I,ve spend time with my mom on mothersday . She is almost 78 and her 40 year daughter is gone ? But in spirit we are together and also with the Bijkersma family . Thankyou also for all your support during these day . My parents pray every day atleast 3 timer for you . I know because I,ve spend 2 weeks with them . I cant sleep at night and have to take sleeping pills .
Hi Pierre,
I’m really sorry about your sister’s death. It’s a senseless killing that has robbed you and your family of a loved entirely too soon.
There is really nothing that I can say or do to make this any easier, because I know…there will always be an emptiness where she was supposed to be.
I’m lucky in the sense that I nearly lost my brother to crime and violence twice last year, and each time he was saved but what I can only describe as the grace of God. If our roles were reversed and it was my sibling who had been murdered I am not sure that I would have been able to cope with it at all.
Please also convey my condolences to your parents and your family…
Elsje Wouda, the caretaker, was my best friend.
That thing who did so teribly wrong is abaolute nothing to world or anyone.
I still want some answers…
I am very sorry for your loss Del, I hope that you get some answers and some peace about this senseless tragedy.